“Planty” (2018-2020)
We are here to honor the memory of that little green plant from the corner of your office, taken away from us tragically after being stranded alone with nobody to water it during the quarantine.
He, (or she?) was a selfless, calming presence who transformed your cold, windowless, fluorescent-lit world into a lush wilderness paradise full of wonder and possibility. Your bond grew over the years as you carefully watered him (or her?) with stolen distilled water from the water cooler and lovingly pruned dead branches.
“Planty,” as you affectionately called xir, (or zir?) faithfully provided you with oxygen, which was important since there are no other visible sources of oxygen anywhere in your small office. Planty listened to you patiently as you read your passive aggressive emails out loud while determining whether to send them or not. Ze was a good, good friend.
We can only wonder what Planty thought while waiting, alone and dehydrated, as the days turned to weeks and no one showed up. We like to think that as Planty breathed his last, he whispered your name with fondness.
Thankfully, the Home & Garden store down the street is still open and selling more Plantys for 50% off.
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